Tangled Up in a Memory
by lulutree
Summary: Actually based on the series. Set immediately after episode Cassandra Vs Eugene. Rapunzel struggles with the reminder of a past traumatic event after causing a similar event. One shot.


Sleep, Rapunzel had tried to sleep. For the second night in a row now, sleep had mostly eluded her. All she saw when she closed her eyes was Eugene's face as the life drained out of him. It would immediately wake her up.

After two attempts at a full eight hours, Rapunzel got up and walked to her window seat and sat down, curled up in a blanket. The grounds below were quiet and still. The ocean beyond rippled gently, causing the reflection of the moon to dance along the water. Normally, Rapunzel would find this sight enchanting, but not this night.

I couldn't see the moon on the water from the tower, she thought.

She looked around her. Her room suddenly felt confining and oppressive.

Eugene's lifeless face popped into her mind again, his eyes nearly closed, staring into nothingness.

Rapunzel shook her head, as if the physical movement could dislodge the intrusive thought from her brain. She got up from the window seat and quickly dressed in her favorite purple dress. She had to get out of that room.

"Out of the tower, out of the tower," she muttered, stopping once she realized what she was saying. "I mean my room."

She turned sharply when a chirrup sounded to her right. Pascal stood up from his miniature bed and stretched.

"I'm going out for some air, Pascal. I want to be alone."

Palace guards nodded to the young princess as she passed, but made no move to stop her. Once she had reached the garden, she sat on one of the many benches. She took a deep breath and tried to clear her mind. Eugene's grey, lifeless, slack face intruded into her mind again, and she cried out slightly, clutching her head in both hands.

"No, no Rapunzel," she said, aloud. "Eugene is fine now, Flynn-no Eugene is fine!"

"Rapunzel? Raps?"

Rapunzel turned to see Cassandra slowly, unsurely approach the bench.

"A guard told me you were out here, he said you looked very upset."

Cassandra stood next to the bench.

"Can I sit down?"

Rapunzel gave a single nod. She couldn't bear to look at Cass. Seeing her was only making the memories appear more clearly in her mind.

The sounds of the captain yelling, the dripping of the damp dungeon, the gruff voices of the Stabbington Brothers echoing around her head, making it throb and the world spin. The sights and sounds of the events from that evening blended together and suddenly, Rapunzel was back in the tower room, tied up and gagged, watching helplessly as Mother Gothel stood behind Flynn Rider…no Eugene, and stabbed him in the stomach. Blood, blood, so much blood…

"So much blood…so much blood…" Rapunzel found herself sobbing.

The princess was being held up by Cassandra, the other woman's arms wrapped tightly around her.

"Rapunzel, can you hear me? What's wrong? Rapunzel, you are scaring me!"

Rapunzel shook herself free of Cass's embrace and stood up.

"Don't restrain me, don't ever restrain me!" Rapunzel shouted at her friend.

The princess stood glaring at Cass. She wasn't sure why she was suddenly so angry and defensive towards her friend. She also didn't understand why her memories of her last night in the tower were flooding her mind, but she felt powerless to stop it.

Cassandra put her hands up.

"I'm sorry, Raps. I won't restrain you. Please sit down."

Rapunzel took a deep breath and slowly lowered herself back to the bench.

"Rapunzel, what is going on? We've all been worried about you. Tell me, please!"

Cass, her parents and Eugene had all tried to talk to her over the past two days, but she couldn't bear their attentions. She felt like she couldn't face them.

"What happened was my fault," Rapunzel whispered. "You and Eugene could have died and it would have been my fault."

* * *

 **Two Nights Earlier**

Happily, Rapunzel skipped down to the castle dungeon, Cass and Eugene had been locked together in the cell for hours. Surely, they had learned how to get along by now.

Initially, she was thrilled by the sound of voices, but once she saw palace guards, including the captain, armed with crossbows, horrible dread replaced her excitement. Terror replaced her dread once she saw what the guards were pointing their weapons at.

The murderous Stabbington Brothers had their arms around Eugene and Cassandra. Their muscles bulged as they tightened their grip on Rapunzel's friend and her true love, using them as human shields. The one holding Cass had the blade of a halberd to her throat. The captain had ordered his men to lower their weapons and the Stabbingtons got away down the hall with their human shields.

Rapunzel's mind had gone blank with shock and terror for a few moments. The memory of her last day in the tower nudging at the back of her mind, creeping into her thoughts. She had snapped herself out of it once she realized she could get to her friends sooner than the guards could. Duty had superseded anything nasty that her brain was cooking up for her. She was able to move forward and focus on her joy that Cass and Eugene were alright and the Brothers were back in custody.

That was until an hour later when Eugene had shown her his injuries.

He had been tossed against a wall twice during the ordeal, once by the Stabbington Brothers and once by the blow back from the second tunnel collapse he and Cass had caused, resulting in the recapture of the brothers.

Eugene had received a bump on the back of his head and bruises across his shoulders. Cass had received similar injuries.

Seeing Eugene hurt and her being at the center of it once again was too much for her. Images of Eugene dying in her arms and of Mother Gothel falling to her death began intruding into her thoughts.

She had run off to her room and refused to see anyone. Guilt, confusion, anger, self-hatred and sadness flowing through her like a river.

* * *

 **Present**

"Your room guards say you haven't been eating," Cass said, startling Rapunzel from her reverie.

"I just haven't been hungry."

"So you feel guilty for what happened in the dungeon?"

"Yeah, I…I sent you two down there. It wasn't supposed to be like that. It was a stupid thing to do."

Cassandra sensed that now was not the time for her usual banter. She needed to remain serious if she was going to get Rapunzel to tell her what was really going on.

"You were talking about blood a little while ago," Cass said. "What were you talking about?"

"I was talking about before…" Rapunzel said, trailing off.

"Before what?" Cass asked. "Whatever it is, you can tell me. No matter what it is, I'm here for you, Rapunzel."

Cass gently squeezed Rapunzel's hand. Rapunzel shook her head slightly.

"I can't talk about it," the princess gasped out, tears returning to her cheeks. "If I try, it makes me feel like I am choking."

"Would telling your mother about it be better? Or even Eugene?"

Rapunzel shook her head.

"Eugene already knows all about it."

"I admit, I haven't been told that much about your time away from the castle, after you were kidnapped."

"She lied to me for eighteen years…" Rapunzel whispered. "Eighteen years I was locked in that tower. Made me think I loved her…she never loved me."

"Rapunzel, I can't imagine what it must have been like."

"Now, I know now how horrible it was, but back then I knew no different. I thought she loved me, she taught me everything I knew, to read, write, cook, everything. She was nice to me sometimes, but I know it was all an act. She had me so brainwashed…"

Rapunzel stopped speaking at the sound of a voice.

"Cassandra?"

It was Cassandra's father.

"I'm here!" she called back.

The Captain of the Guard hurried over. He was trying to hide it, but there was an undertone of concern in his expression. He smiled just a bit as he laid eyes on his daughter.

"Cassandra, there you are. I was passing by your quarters and you weren't there. I was just wanting to make sure you were OK, not in any pain or anything like that."

Cassandra stood and placed a hand on her father's shoulder.

"I'm just fine," she said, smiling.

The man nodded and looked towards Rapunzel. His brows furrowed in concern.

"Are you alright princess? You do not look well."

"I'm handling it, father," Cass said, sitting back down with Rapunzel. "I'll let you know if we need your assistance."

The captain nodded.

"Goodnight then."

Neither of the women spoke again until the captain was out of earshot.

"Please keep going, Rapunzel," Cass said, gently. "Who had you brainwashed?"

"Mother Gothel, she told me so many things that weren't true. She was the one to take me from my real parents, locked me up in her tower, used me and taught me to fear the world. She taught me that men were evil and violent beings to be feared. I learned that there are bad men out there, but most are like my father and your father and like how Eugene really is. Most are kind."

"Eugene, kind, I don't really…"

"I know you don't trust him, but I do. He gave his life for me. I lost my magical hair because he wanted me to live."

"I'm a little confused. He died?"

Rapunzel nodded and swallowed.

"It's hard to talk about, that night in the tower," she said.

Cass squeezed the princess' hand.

"I understand, but please try. It might help to share your story."

Rapunzel took a deep breath.

"It all started when I wanted to see the lights that would float through the sky on the same day every year," Rapunzel said. "I learned later they were lanterns set into the air in honor of my birthday. Anyway, Eugene helped me out of the tower and I spent some time with him. Eventually I was tricked into returning to the tower, I remember the sun symbol and realize who I am and I confronted Mother Gothel. We argued and she tied me up and gagged me, planning on leaving with me and setting up a new hiding place."

Rapunzel paused and took a shaky breath.

"I could hear him, calling for me from the bottom of the tower. I-I couldn't stop him…I couldn't warn him!" Rapunzel cried. "Gothel threw my hair down for him to climb up and hid by the window so he wouldn't see her. I tried to warn him, but I couldn't talk around the gag. She stepped out and stabbed Eugene in the stomach…she was standing behind him just like the Stabbington Brothers were standing behind him…and you."

"Oh, Raps," Cass said, squeezing her hand again.

"It reminded me so much of being in the tower. I keep feeling like I am back there."

"But you both survived and returned to Corona…"

"I managed to finally get the gag off and told Gothel that if she let me heal Eugene, I'd go with her. I'd never fight her or try to escape if she let me heal him. I said if she didn't let me heal him, I'd fight and scream every step of the way and I would never stop trying to escape."

"Wow, you were willing to give your life for his," Cass said.

"And he would too. He nearly did. Gothel chained him to a post and let me heal him. Before I could, he used a piece of a broken mirror to cut off all my hair, to how it was when you met me. The hair on my head and the cut locks all turned brown."

Rapunzel took a shuddering breath.

"He thought by cutting my hair off, I'd be useless to Mother Gothel, that I'd be free. I watched him die in my arms. He was willing to give his life for me to be free. The last bit of magic came out in a tear I cried over him…he was nearly dead in my arms. I watched the life drain out of him. He was so cold, so limp…"

Rapunzel's voice trailed off and she fell into sobs that wracked her body. Cassandra put an arm around the princess and hugged her to her body.

"I-I-I j-just couldn't handle seeing you two like that. It felt like I was back in the tower watching Eugene get stabbed again…I was powerless, just like I was in the tower."

"Hey, you were ready this time. You had a plan to help us. You were the first to find us. We just were able to take care of the Stabbingtons quickly."

"If I hadn't locked you up in the dungeon, none of this would have ever happened. Eugene wouldn't be hurt again."

"Eugene is fine and so am I. A few bruises never stopped either one of us. True, if you hadn't locked us in the cell, that wouldn't have happened, but I know you meant no harm. What's done is done, we have to move on. No one was killed or seriously harmed, that doesn't deserve it anyway. I hear those brothers are still seeing stars from the beam I dropped on them."

Cass said the final sentence with a touch of pride in her voice. She sighed and clasped Rapunzel's hand again.

"Raps, I'm not mad at you, no one is, for what happened. You need to forgive yourself. What Gothel did to you is not your fault. Neither is what she did to Eugene. And Gothel dying is also not your fault. If anything, she deserved it."

"Talking isn't helping me," Rapunzel said. "I keep seeing Eugene's face in my mind. I just want to be alone right now."

Rapunzel jumped up from the bench and hurried away towards the castle. Her mind didn't register where it was she was going, only that she needed to be away from Cassandra.

How dare she make me relive that day in the tower! She thought angrily. If she really cared, she'd help me forget about it!

She very briefly wondered where her anger was coming from, but quickly lost that train of thought as the feeling of being trapped in the tower crept over her again and she realized that she was now standing inside a small room. It was Eugene's room, he was nowhere to be seen. She hadn't registered where it was she was going.

Even though this room was less than a third the size of her own, she didn't quite feel the same sense of claustrophobia that her room made her feel. Here, she felt safe. She felt a sharp pang of guilt for avoiding him for so long. He must be worried about her.

I wonder where Eugene is, she thought, looking around the room. She saw nothing that hinted at his whereabouts.

Rapunzel was about to leave when the door behind her opened. A shirtless Eugene stepped into the room. His hair was tousled and damp and he had a towel slung over a shoulder. His thick eyebrows shot up in surprise when he saw her.

"Rapunzel, are you alright?" he asked, tossing the towel onto a wood chair.

Concern flooded his handsome features as he reached out to her with both hands. Her disheveled appearance and the wild-eyed look on her face alarmed him. She shuffled backwards, away from his hands.

"Sorry…I don't really know why I came here. I'll leave."

She took a step forward and to the side in an attempt to leave.

"Rapunzel, please! Will you talk to me! You shut yourself up in your room and won't speak to anyone, we are worried about you!"

"I already told Cassandra everything. It didn't help. I came here…I don't know why I came here."

Rapunzel took another step forward. Eugene let his arms go limp at his sides.

"Well tell me, Rapunzel! I can't help you if you won't let me!"

"You-you already know. When I saw you being held by the Stabbington brother, it was just like seeing you being held by Gothel when she stabbed you. I keep seeing your face as you died in my arms, it just pops into my head. I don't want it to, but I can't stop it!"

Rapunzel broke down crying and Eugene wrapped her up in an embrace. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, she could smell the sweet soap he'd used. After a few moments she tightly returned the embrace, her arms going under his arms and her hands ending up on his shoulder blades. He winced as her hands applied pressure to his shoulders and she stepped back quickly.

"Eugene, I'm-I'm so sorry, are you alright?"

"Yah, yah, I'm fine, just sore right there. I just got back from the soldiers' baths. I was hoping a warm bath would relax my muscles."

He took a step towards Rapunzel. She still had a look on her face that said she still wanted to run, but she seemed to be focusing on his wellbeing now, rather than what was happening to her.

"Come sit down," he said, gently guiding her to his bed.

She sat down on the edge of it.

"Do you want anything to drink? Water, tea? Something stronger?"

"No, thank you, Eugene."

The man grabbed the shirt that was lying over the end of his bed and put it on and sat down on his bed, next to the headboard, giving Rapunzel a few feet of space so she would feel more comfortable. He folded his hands into his lap.

"You said you are seeing things? Intrusive thoughts?"

"Yes, the image of you dying keep intruding into my thoughts."

"Anything else?"

"I've been having nightmares about our last day in the tower, I was tied up and couldn't warn you."

"Anything else nasty going on?"

"Earlier, I felt trapped in my room. I thought for a moment that I was in the tower. I've felt trapped since the dungeon incident, but I felt a little scared leaving my room. I finally just left this evening. I couldn't sleep because of the nightmares. A little while ago, I was remembering the Stabbington Brothers using you as human shields, and it turned into a memory of that last day in the tower."

"Oh, Rapunzel," Eugene said, pain showing on his face. "I'm so sorry, I should have known. I know what it is."

"You do?" Rapunzel said, feeling a small amount of relief.

"Natural disaster survivors, war veterans, victims of violent crimes, and so on, can have what you have. Not all of them do, just some. People who experience traumatic events can have adverse and sometimes lasting aftereffects of those events. While it is all in their minds, it can cause them to physically and mentally sick. It doesn't always effect you immediately after the event, it can strike days, weeks, months afterwards. I think that is what happened here. You experienced a traumatic event the other day that was similar to a previous traumatic event you experienced and had managed to mentally step away from, but the more recent event has brought all those feelings and experiences to the surface and are effecting you now. It's only been a few months since what happened in the tower."

"Eugene, how do you know all this?" Rapunzel said, a slight smile appearing on her face.

"I've gotten drunk with lots of veterans and I've heard some of them talk about it. I once stole a delivery for a doctor here in Corona during the winter. I got caught in a blizzard and had to take shelter in a cave. I read the medical books he had ordered. One was about diseases of the mind. Learned lots of interesting things."

"So, there's a cure?"

"You do need to see a doctor for an official diagnosis and treatment. I do know that it is something you could have with you forever, but it can be managed, maybe cured, I don't know."

Rapunzel reached out and took Eugene by the forearm. She had him turn so she could see his back. She pulled up his shirt to look. Stretching from his right and left shoulders was purple and yellow bruises. She reached up into his hair on the back of his head and found a tender spot.

"The bump on my head is mostly gone," Eugene said. "It doesn't hurt unless it is touched. My shoulders are quiet sore still though."

"Do you need anything, any medicine? I could try using my hair, there's no one in here to see me use it."

There was a slight sob in her voice as she spoke. Eugene turned back around and grasped her hands in both of his. He smiled at her.

"Rapunzel, I am just fine. Thank you though…is thinking of using your magic upsetting to you?"

"Yah, the last time I used it…it was on you…"

Eugene smiled and took her hand, squeezing it.

"I understand. They are just bruises. They will be gone in a few days…"

Eugene was about to say he'd had worse, but wisely stopped himself. No need upsetting Rapunzel further.

The princess didn't seem to notice he'd suddenly stopped talking and was pulling back the covers on the bed. She scooted underneath them. She turned to look back at Eugene, patting the mattress beside her. Eugene eagerly lay down, cuddled up beside her.

"Well, if I'm caught and I'm killed, at least I'll die happy," he said, grinning cheekily at the princess, before realizing what he'd said was inappropriate at that time. "I'm sorry, bad habits…"

She managed a grin back at him and pulled the blankets up and over them. As directed by Rapunzel, he turned to face the opposite wall that the bed was pushed up against and she curled up tightly next to him, draping arm over his waist. He could feel her breath teasing the tiny hairs on the back of his neck. It sent shivers down his spine.

"Oh, are you cold?" Rapunzel asked sleepily, pressing herself closer to him.

"I was, but not anymore, thank you."

"I think I'll be able to sleep now," she said quietly into his neck, her words slightly slurred. "I'll go see a doctor in the morning."

And she did, but she was not the only one, after Cassandra found the pair sleeping in the same bed the following morning…


End file.
